What does your appearance do to your mental health?
What does your appearance do to your mental health?

How you look affects how you feel. You probably feel less confident wearing sweatpants while lounging on a  couch than while wearing a dress and heels (or a suit, if you are a man). It has a huge impact on how you feel mentally.

Do you know that feeling of being in you PJs the whole day with your hair in a bun, feeling not sexy at all? It feels very different than when you wear nice lingerie, or a tight dress with high heels and make-up on.

Awareness during my burnout

When I had my burnout I started to oblige myself to take a shower every morning and to wear jeans with a shirt. Wearing the same leggings  as during the night  doesn’t do you any good. In addition, this also  makes it less likely for you to go outside for for groceries for example, or just for a walk.

I did not do very much, even with my jeans on. But at least I did not feel gross or totally hopeless. After a while, I decided to wear some make-up again. In the beginning it was not really helpful. I did not feel any better and did not look any better. I was very tired and you could notice that clearly even if I had  make-up on. But after a while it helped and I started to feel more confident.

Also the weight loss helped – I started wearing skirts and dresses again. My therapist also noticed that. She gave me a compliment that I  didn’t only take care of my mental health, but I also started to take care of myself in general.

Self love

When I started to work again last year, I wanted to look neat. So I started to dye my hair again and I got gel nails at a nail stylist. I always kept my nails neat, never missed an appointment. But I stopped taking care of my hair.

I didn’t go to a hairdresser for about 9 months. I knew that I needed a haircut. I tried a lot of remedies to make it look decent but in reality it didn’t look any better.
When a friend of mine,  who is a hairdresser, needed a model for a training session, I immediately sent her a message. You guessed it already, she wanted me as her model! It was last Monday. After bleaching my hair we talked about the color that I was going to  get. Pink? Yes pink, but with a little purple on top. Yes, let’s do that!

The result

It’s so different now. A very different color and a very different haircut. When I was in a train back home I received some photos from my friend and I could get used to it a bit. My partner already sent me a message that he liked it. As soon as he saw me he said: “Cool!” So that was certainly a good reaction!

I also get enthusiastic messages from friends. This helps me to become more self-confident!

I feel different. I would never have chosen the colors myself if I were to sit in the barber’s chair. But I certainly trust my friend, who would never do anything with my hair that would not suit me. Now, one day later, I am really happy with it. I feel a bit different but in a good way.

Take care of yourself!

I can recommend anyone to take care of your appearance! New dresses, a new haircut, new lingerie. Or, for example, try a make-up course. Change can certainly be good, as long as you do it for yourself!

The song of this week is Flying Blind by Ilse DeLange. I sing this song mega loudly if I feel good. And I do that now! Despite the setbacks, I trust myself and people around me. I enjoy life, even small things. The sunshine on my face in the train. Cycling with my partner. And yes, dying my hair in a crazy color!

Love, Renée x

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Renée

Expert in PTSD, burnout, personality disorders and eating disorder. Even if I only help one person by sharing my story, I am happy!

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